THE INVITATION
At the same moment the reminder email came across the internal system, Tina turned around in her desk, nearly taking her phone off the desk with the headset that was still attached to her head. "So, Winn...have you decided who you're taking to the Christmas party?"
The company held their annual Christmas party according to state. Texas had their statewide party, Oklahoma had theirs, etc. Oklahoma's party was taking place in Oklahoma City on the coming Saturday, the first Saturday of the month. Winn had barely made the effort to attend at all, though she had at least sent in her RSVP for good measure.
"Decided? I didn't realize I had a decision to make."
Tina and Steph glanced at each other and now Steph turned around, too. "Come on," Tina said. "You know what I'm talking about. Are you taking Isaac or Taylor?"
Winn's eyes widened in surprise. "Um...I actually wasn't planning on taking either one of them..."
"So you're going alone?" Steph said incredulously.
"There's nothing wrong with that," Winn said defensively.
"Winn!" Tina said. "You literally have two of the hottest men in Tulsa falling all over you, don't say you don't have a date option for the party!"
Winn had to laugh. She couldn't help it. "Falling all over me? Believe me, that is hardly the situation."
"She's in denial," Steph said.
"I'm telling the truth," Winn said. "Tay and I are friends and nothing more and Ike--well, it's--we're--it's a little complicated..."
"You figured it out, didn't you?" Steph said. "About Isaac and his...status around here..."
"Well we're not...we're not dating or anything, we're just--I'm aware of the way things are. And so is he. We're just--"
"Friends," Charles suddenly spoke up.
Winn smiled at Charles. "Sure. You could call it that. Maybe...Just not in the way I'm friends with Tay."
"Well, all friendships are different," he offered.
Her smile widened. "Exactly. That's exactly it."
"Which brings me back to the original question," Tina said. "Who are you bringing?"
"Neither," Winn said. "I said I was going alone. I'm sure both of them have better things to do anyway."
Tina and Steph glanced at each other before they turned back to their computers. "I'm sure," Tina muttered.
As Winn went back to calling her accounts, her mind ran rampant. The Christmas party? A date? It had never crossed her mind until just now. But since Isaac was so desperate to get back in her good graces, maybe there WAS a way he could make it up to her that DIDN'T involve libraries or erotic promises...
*************
Winn returned the stalking favor by following Isaac home that night. She actually hadn't intended to. It just happened to be mere coincidence that she ended up behind him on the way to his condo.
As they pulled into the parking lot, she pulled in beside him and got out of her car. He met her halfway, surprise all over his face. "So, glasses again?" She said, trying to make light of the tension in the air.
"Yeah," he said nonchalantly, pulling them off his face and shoving them inside his jacket. "I gotta make an appointment with the optometrist to get my contacts readjusted, what are you doing here, returning the favor?"
"The stalking favor? Sure, why not?"
Closing in on her quickly, he took her face in his hands and kissed her passionately. She returned the kiss, unable to help herself, and he pulled away quickly and smiled. "Damn, your lips are freezing."
She laughed shyly, her breath visible in the air. "Well, it's unusually cold out here tonight."
"You're right. It is. Let's get you upstairs and...and I'll turn up the heat and we can get you out of all those layers..."
"Um...I was actually hoping we could maybe just talk..."
"You're killing me. How can you send me the message you sent me and then only want to talk when we see each other? Did you know that that almost became my ring tone? And then I had to think better of it..."
Winn giggled. "I sure hope you thought better of it."
"I've never masturbated so many times in such a short amount of time as I have these past two days..."
"I'm sorry. I'm not--I'm not trying to be a tease, I just--I dunno, I was feeling the moment and..."
"Don't apologize. Feel free to clue me in any time you happen to feel the moment. I mean, every single time..."
"It's really cold out here," she said again.
"Oh. Right. Come on."
He kissed her in the elevator. He pinned her against the wall and propped his arms above her head. She held on for dear life by his scarf and the few seconds they spent making out in the elevator turned her on. It was the glasses. She knew it was the glasses and she kind of wished he was still wearing them.
She couldn't keep her hands off of him as he unlocked his door. Why did she always seem to turn into this...version of herself when she was around him? She'd never felt more like herself and less like herself all at the same time and the thought was a little dizzying.
When they got in the door, and Isaac locked it behind them, he returned to her and began to unbutton her coat. "Can I take your coat?"
She smiled at him, appreciative and amused. "Why, yes, you may."
He smiled back at her as he peeled her coat from her shoulders. "Excuse me. MAY I take your coat?"
She giggled.
"And maybe the rest of your clothes?"
She blushed and shook her head. "I said just talk."
He sighed and pecked her lips once more before he took her coat and her scarf and hung them on a nearby rack. "You're right. You did. Are you hungry?" He asked as he removed his own coat.
"Um, I'm sorry, I didn't come here to impose--"
"Look around," he smirked. "What could you possibly be imposing on?"
"You. I mean, I showed up unannounced...does that make me a hypocrite or anything?"
He crossed back over to her and slid his arms around her waist again, looking her over in her in her burgundy, high-waisted pencil skirt and her cream-colored button-down shirt that ruffled at the neck and cuffed at the wrists. "Hell, no," he said, letting his hands explore her. "You can impose anytime you want to. Actually, I encourage the imposition." Then he smiled and pulled away from her. "Give me a minute to go throw on something more comfortable, then I'll throw something together for us."
"Don't come in here naked..."
He winked at her. "I can if you want me to..."
"Just go do what you gotta do," she laughed.
As she watched him walk into his bedroom, she took it upon herself to kick off her own shoes. It wasn't as if she hadn't spent the night there already. Making herself comfortable was practically a requirement by now. Right?
She found herself sitting at the bar, fiddling with her phone as she waited for him. Taylor had texted her and her heart sank a little. She wasn't sure why it did, but for some reason, his simple, "Hey, what are you up to?" was enough to make her feel guilty. She guessed she felt guilty being in Isaac's condo now after making such a dramatic fuss over him bringing the girl to Thanksgiving. She supposed maybe she felt ashamed of herself for actually forgiving him for what he did after Taylor was such a good friend to her afterward. Why did it feel like she was blatantly slapping him in the face?
However, she couldn't find it in her heart to ignore him and she especially couldn't find
it in her heart to lie. "I'm at Ike's," she texted back.
Her heart pounded at the anticipation of his response.
"Oh," he texted back. "Didn't realize you two patched things up."
"It kinda just happened," she texted.
"Okay. Well I'll leave you to it. Sorry to bother you."
"You're not bothering me."
"Goodnight, Winn."
"Are you mad?"
"Why would I be mad? I can't get mad at you."
"Am I a hypocrite?"
"No."
"Why do I feel like you're mad?"
"I'm not mad. Promise. Enjoy your night. Keep him in line, he needs it."
"Goodnight, Tay."
And that was the last she heard from him.
She got up and she crossed the room, dropping her phone into her purse that hung from the coat rack. It wouldn't hurt her feelings if she didn't lay eyes on it again for the rest of the night. She didn't like the way she felt after that short text exchange. She didn't like it at all.
Desperate for a distraction, she helped herself to Isaac's kitchen, searching for, and retrieving, wine glasses and wine. Thankfully, he had a bottle chilling and as she poured herself a glass and took a satisfyingly long sip, she spied Isaac watching her from the doorway. She raised her eyebrows and smiled. "Your 'something comfortable' doesn't vary too much from your previous attire. It took you that long to untuck your shirt and take off your jacket?"
"And take my shoes off."
"Oh. Well excuse me."
"Were you timing me?" He smirked.
"I wasn't until just now."
"Why won't you just admit already that you miss me?"
She raised her chin and took in a breath. "Fine. Maybe I missed you...a little..."
He smirked again, amused, as he walked into the kitchen. "Only a little? Because that message you sent me sounded like you missed me quite a bit..."
"Maybe more than a little..."
He circled around her and rested his palms against the black, marble counter top on either side of her. She turned her head to see him over her shoulder and he kissed her cheek. "This is gonna sound crazy, but there's never been a woman on this side of the bar before."
"Um, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude, I just REALLY needed a glass of wine..."
"No, absolutely help yourself. I have nothing to hide here."
"Well, the wine WAS easy to find..."
"Very funny," he smiled.
She turned around in his arms and got a better look at him and she grinned. "You smell amazing."
She swore she saw him blush a little. "It's the aftershave. It's new, actually, I've never used this kind before."
"That's a lie. You were wearing it at the library the other night."
A grin spread across his face. "You noticed."
"I've also noticed your glasses. Which I'm pleased that you've put back on. I don't know what it is about those glasses but they're incredibly sexy."
"Mmm," he said, searching her face, his eyes lingering on her lips. "Keep talking."
"You like to hear me talk about you? How conceited."
"This is actually the first time you've opened up like this and told me what you like. Forgive me if I'm a little excited about it."
"That's not true, I told you I like your smile."
"And my laugh."
"See? You remember."
"Tell me more."
"How do you know there's more?"
"There's always more."
She scrunched her nose in a grin and glanced downward. "I like how you walk around your house in your bare feet."
He chuckled, amused. "I'm at home. Isn't that normal?"
"It is, I just...I don't know, outside your front door you kinda come across as...I dunno..."
"Pretentious?" He smiled, amused.
"Maybe that's a little harsh..."
"You didn't think it was too harsh not too long ago."
"Things change."
"Do they?"
"If you want them to."
"I want them to."
"So make it happen."
"You make it sound so easy."
"Because it is."
Isaac's lips closed in on Winn's and she wanted to melt. Damn, he was such a good kisser. After a moment, after his tongue completely intoxicated her, Isaac broke the kiss and whispered to her, "Come to bed with me."
Winn's response? The grumbling of her stomach. Loudly.
They both burst into laughter as they both glanced downward. "Or I could make dinner," he said, amused. "Priorities, right?"
He pulled away from her and she pulled him back by his collar. "Hold on, did you say you were making dinner?"
"Yes, I did."
She narrowed her eyes in intrigue and she smiled. "Wow, I didn't know you cooked...I mean, judging by last time..."
He smiled at her, amused, as he searched her face. "I'm single, I'm not helpless."
"I mean, I didn't know, I just..."
"I mean, I'm no gourmet chef or anything," he said, inching his face closer to hers. "But I open the meanest jar of spaghetti sauce on this side of the city."
Winn giggled. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," he smiled, nudging her nose with his.
"Now you're speaking my language," she flirted. "Now get off of me and get to work, I'm starving."
Winn circled the bar and sat down with her wine as she happily watched Isaac work in the kitchen. There wasn't much to what he was doing and he refused to let her help, so they laughed and they talked as she became increasingly turned on by the series of events unfolding in front of her. From the way he rolled up his shirt sleeves, to the way he made her laugh, to the act of his cooking at all, Winn was finding herself on sensory overload and the wine wasn't helping. She wouldn't sleep with him tonight, but she wanted to right now more than ever.
*************
Midway through dinner, and two glasses of wine later, Isaac looked Winn in the eye as he sat next to her at the bar. "You came here for a reason. And I know it wasn't for me to throw together a ten-minute spaghetti."
"I did," she confessed. "I, um, you were right. About a couple of things. And I really had to think some things through. I'm in no way excusing the stunt you pulled on Thanksgiving. Let me just make that clear. However, you're right in the fact that we are not exclusive, you do NOT have any obligations to me, and you didn't technically promise me anything. Those things are true. So maybe, MAYBE in just a couple of very small aspects, I was a little unfair to you."
Isaac furrowed his brow in confusion. "Are you--are you accepting my apology? Because, I mean, I understand if you don't--"
"If you and I were...yanno, a 'thing'...we'd be having a completely different conversation. Actually, I wouldn't be sitting here at all, I probably would have done something creative to you, but--but we're not. So I guess, in some ways, I don't really have much room to make demands at you. You know?"
Isaac wiped his mouth with his napkin and dropped it on the table, sitting back in his bar stool. "What exactly are you trying to say?"
Winn sighed. "I think we should start over. I just--while I'm still a little wary, I enjoy spending time with you. I want to get to know you. But in the meantime, my body can't resist you. It just can't. I, like--I fucking want you ALL the time. Excuse my language, but it's starting to become a little unbearable and a little out of character--"
"Do you want to fuck me, Winn?"
"Um," she swallowed hard. "Um, eventually...I, uh, I wouldn't mind..."
"Because all you gotta do is say the word. I'll do anything to your body you want me to do. No questions asked."
She felt herself blushing. "Um, I think we're getting off subject here--"
"I don't think we are. I think what I'm getting out of this is, you want a casual, sexual relationship. Except you're not ready for the sex part yet. But you want me to wait around and fuck around with you until you are--without getting emotionally attached to me. Because, ultimately, you're afraid of me. So the less you have to feel, the better. As long as your body's getting what it needs, it's not necessary for your heart to get in the
way. How far off the mark am I?"
Winn gaped at him, speechless. Did it really sound that bad? "Um, I mean, when you put it that way--"
"Deal," he said.
She was shocked. "Uh, deal?"
"Yeah. You have yourself a deal. That's all I wanted from the start. That's what I thought we were doing. I like you, Winn. Probably a little more than I should. But I'm not even close to being emotionally available for anything more than what we have now. Someday I'd like to be--but let's not rush it."
"Yeah, but--I mean, it's not--I'm not seeing anyone else. That's the difference here. I'm not sitting here telling you that I'm willing to be one of your floozies--"
"I know. I know, and you're not. That's where--that's where I'm willing to change up my game a little bit. I want--I'm just--I'm really only interested in you right now. And that's the truth. Believe it or don't believe it."
"I'm just--I'm a little scared--"
"What's there to be scared of if you already know what to expect?"
Her eyes darted around the room in thought. He had a point. It was easier said than done, of course, but he still made a very valid point. She needed to loosen up a little bit. Why couldn't she be comfortable with Isaac like she was with Taylor? Oh, no. Please do not think of Taylor right now.
She flashed a smile across her face, desperate to redirect her focus back to Isaac. "Well, then. I, uh, I think we've reached an understanding."
"It's about damn time," Isaac said, turning up his wine glass.
Winn smirked back at him as she turned up her own.
**************
An hour later, Winn found herself where she sort of expected she would end up, but a little more okay with it--underneath Isaac in his guest bed. She took him at his word and he was patient, only going as far as she would let him go. Which, at the moment, was a little farther than maybe she intended, but she wasn't drunk, so she still had plenty of control of herself.
She'd allowed him to remove her skirt, and now he rested between her legs as he unbuttoned her shirt and kissed her lips. She was severely exposed. Oddly enough, she felt more exposed now than she did when she'd stripped for him two weeks prior and that was largely due to the position she'd found herself in at the present moment. In spite of herself, she was so terribly turned on that she knew she had to keep a firm grip on herself before she gave in to something she knew she would grow to regret. She needed to take it slow. She just wasn't ready for sex. She wanted to be, but it nagged at her how she wasn't. She had to respect herself before she cared about what anyone else thought about it.
Isaac opened her shirt and lowered his mouth onto her neck. She decided to give in, just for the moment, and she arched her back at the chills she got from his hot breath caressing her neck. He ran his hands along her skin as his kisses trailed from her neck to her collar bone and further down her chest. His hand, however, had traveled even lower and Winn's nerves found themselves at an all-time high.
His thumb ran along the seam of her cotton panties and he whispered in her ear, "Do you know how easy it would be to just slide in there right now?"
Winn's breathing thickened. Of course she knew. It was all she could think about. "Ike, I--I mean, let's not--just--"
"I know you want me."
"I do. I do want you, I just--just not--" Finally, she had to reach down and redirect his hand upward. "I'm sorry, I'm just not ready."
"You're not even going to let me touch you?"
"I just--if you knew how bad I wanted it, you'd be in trouble," she scoffed. "I just--I know myself. You know? I know me. And--and if I--if you--I don't want to do anything before I'm ready and I don't want to regret it. Believe it or not, control isn't something I do well and I know what my triggers are..."
Isaac sighed and hung his head for a moment as he ran the back of his hand along her stomach. "It's okay. I get it. It's fine."
"Please don't be upset. I promise I'm not trying to lead you on. Maybe we should just--not do things like this anymore--"
His head shot up and his eyes darted into hers. "Are you crazy? Are you--I mean, have you seriously lost your mind?"
"I know I've disappointed you, I'm sorry--"
"Would you just stop talking? I don't--I mean, I like this. I like being here with you like this. Even if we're just talking or whatever, I like it."
Winn's eyes widened and her heart melted. "Seriously?"
"Yeah. Seriously. Winn, I'll be honest, I've never--um--" He smiled and he started to blush, which Winn found incredibly adorable. "I've never gone quite this...slow...with a woman..."
"I suspected as much."
"But I like it. It's--it's different--"
A smile crept across her face. "It's the thrill of the chase."
He locked eyes with her once more. "It's not even that anymore."
Her breath caught and she was instantly ready to get the hell out of the conversation. She couldn't change the subject fast enough. "Ike, look--I actually came here with a specific purpose tonight and I haven't even had the chance to address it yet. And you can turn me down if you want to--"
"I can just about guarantee that there's nothing about you I'm going to turn down--"
She smiled, blushing, and she continued, "My, um, my company is having its annual statewide Christmas party this weekend...in Oklahoma City...and, uh, I was, uh, well I was gonna go alone, but then I thought about it and, um, would you maybe want to go with me? I mean, we'd be there overnight, so if you don't have the time I understand but I wanted to--well I wanted to invite you anyway..."
"You want me to come to your company's Christmas party with you?"
"Uh, I mean, if it's too much--"
"Overnight?"
"They're serving alcohol and they've provided us all with rooms..."
He brought his lips to hers and placed sweet pecks on them with his own. "I would absolutely be honored to go to your party with you."
"Really?" She smiled. "You want to go?"
"The invitation means a lot. I'm already looking forward to it."
As he kissed her again, Winn's heart was a complete mess of puddles. She couldn't help the happiness she was beginning to feel at the prospect of Isaac being at her side at her company function in the next few days. She hadn't realized just how hard she'd actually been crushing on him until that very moment.
At the same moment the reminder email came across the internal system, Tina turned around in her desk, nearly taking her phone off the desk with the headset that was still attached to her head. "So, Winn...have you decided who you're taking to the Christmas party?"
The company held their annual Christmas party according to state. Texas had their statewide party, Oklahoma had theirs, etc. Oklahoma's party was taking place in Oklahoma City on the coming Saturday, the first Saturday of the month. Winn had barely made the effort to attend at all, though she had at least sent in her RSVP for good measure.
"Decided? I didn't realize I had a decision to make."
Tina and Steph glanced at each other and now Steph turned around, too. "Come on," Tina said. "You know what I'm talking about. Are you taking Isaac or Taylor?"
Winn's eyes widened in surprise. "Um...I actually wasn't planning on taking either one of them..."
"So you're going alone?" Steph said incredulously.
"There's nothing wrong with that," Winn said defensively.
"Winn!" Tina said. "You literally have two of the hottest men in Tulsa falling all over you, don't say you don't have a date option for the party!"
Winn had to laugh. She couldn't help it. "Falling all over me? Believe me, that is hardly the situation."
"She's in denial," Steph said.
"I'm telling the truth," Winn said. "Tay and I are friends and nothing more and Ike--well, it's--we're--it's a little complicated..."
"You figured it out, didn't you?" Steph said. "About Isaac and his...status around here..."
"Well we're not...we're not dating or anything, we're just--I'm aware of the way things are. And so is he. We're just--"
"Friends," Charles suddenly spoke up.
Winn smiled at Charles. "Sure. You could call it that. Maybe...Just not in the way I'm friends with Tay."
"Well, all friendships are different," he offered.
Her smile widened. "Exactly. That's exactly it."
"Which brings me back to the original question," Tina said. "Who are you bringing?"
"Neither," Winn said. "I said I was going alone. I'm sure both of them have better things to do anyway."
Tina and Steph glanced at each other before they turned back to their computers. "I'm sure," Tina muttered.
As Winn went back to calling her accounts, her mind ran rampant. The Christmas party? A date? It had never crossed her mind until just now. But since Isaac was so desperate to get back in her good graces, maybe there WAS a way he could make it up to her that DIDN'T involve libraries or erotic promises...
*************
Winn returned the stalking favor by following Isaac home that night. She actually hadn't intended to. It just happened to be mere coincidence that she ended up behind him on the way to his condo.
As they pulled into the parking lot, she pulled in beside him and got out of her car. He met her halfway, surprise all over his face. "So, glasses again?" She said, trying to make light of the tension in the air.
"Yeah," he said nonchalantly, pulling them off his face and shoving them inside his jacket. "I gotta make an appointment with the optometrist to get my contacts readjusted, what are you doing here, returning the favor?"
"The stalking favor? Sure, why not?"
Closing in on her quickly, he took her face in his hands and kissed her passionately. She returned the kiss, unable to help herself, and he pulled away quickly and smiled. "Damn, your lips are freezing."
She laughed shyly, her breath visible in the air. "Well, it's unusually cold out here tonight."
"You're right. It is. Let's get you upstairs and...and I'll turn up the heat and we can get you out of all those layers..."
"Um...I was actually hoping we could maybe just talk..."
"You're killing me. How can you send me the message you sent me and then only want to talk when we see each other? Did you know that that almost became my ring tone? And then I had to think better of it..."
Winn giggled. "I sure hope you thought better of it."
"I've never masturbated so many times in such a short amount of time as I have these past two days..."
"I'm sorry. I'm not--I'm not trying to be a tease, I just--I dunno, I was feeling the moment and..."
"Don't apologize. Feel free to clue me in any time you happen to feel the moment. I mean, every single time..."
"It's really cold out here," she said again.
"Oh. Right. Come on."
He kissed her in the elevator. He pinned her against the wall and propped his arms above her head. She held on for dear life by his scarf and the few seconds they spent making out in the elevator turned her on. It was the glasses. She knew it was the glasses and she kind of wished he was still wearing them.
She couldn't keep her hands off of him as he unlocked his door. Why did she always seem to turn into this...version of herself when she was around him? She'd never felt more like herself and less like herself all at the same time and the thought was a little dizzying.
When they got in the door, and Isaac locked it behind them, he returned to her and began to unbutton her coat. "Can I take your coat?"
She smiled at him, appreciative and amused. "Why, yes, you may."
He smiled back at her as he peeled her coat from her shoulders. "Excuse me. MAY I take your coat?"
She giggled.
"And maybe the rest of your clothes?"
She blushed and shook her head. "I said just talk."
He sighed and pecked her lips once more before he took her coat and her scarf and hung them on a nearby rack. "You're right. You did. Are you hungry?" He asked as he removed his own coat.
"Um, I'm sorry, I didn't come here to impose--"
"Look around," he smirked. "What could you possibly be imposing on?"
"You. I mean, I showed up unannounced...does that make me a hypocrite or anything?"
He crossed back over to her and slid his arms around her waist again, looking her over in her in her burgundy, high-waisted pencil skirt and her cream-colored button-down shirt that ruffled at the neck and cuffed at the wrists. "Hell, no," he said, letting his hands explore her. "You can impose anytime you want to. Actually, I encourage the imposition." Then he smiled and pulled away from her. "Give me a minute to go throw on something more comfortable, then I'll throw something together for us."
"Don't come in here naked..."
He winked at her. "I can if you want me to..."
"Just go do what you gotta do," she laughed.
As she watched him walk into his bedroom, she took it upon herself to kick off her own shoes. It wasn't as if she hadn't spent the night there already. Making herself comfortable was practically a requirement by now. Right?
She found herself sitting at the bar, fiddling with her phone as she waited for him. Taylor had texted her and her heart sank a little. She wasn't sure why it did, but for some reason, his simple, "Hey, what are you up to?" was enough to make her feel guilty. She guessed she felt guilty being in Isaac's condo now after making such a dramatic fuss over him bringing the girl to Thanksgiving. She supposed maybe she felt ashamed of herself for actually forgiving him for what he did after Taylor was such a good friend to her afterward. Why did it feel like she was blatantly slapping him in the face?
However, she couldn't find it in her heart to ignore him and she especially couldn't find
it in her heart to lie. "I'm at Ike's," she texted back.
Her heart pounded at the anticipation of his response.
"Oh," he texted back. "Didn't realize you two patched things up."
"It kinda just happened," she texted.
"Okay. Well I'll leave you to it. Sorry to bother you."
"You're not bothering me."
"Goodnight, Winn."
"Are you mad?"
"Why would I be mad? I can't get mad at you."
"Am I a hypocrite?"
"No."
"Why do I feel like you're mad?"
"I'm not mad. Promise. Enjoy your night. Keep him in line, he needs it."
"Goodnight, Tay."
And that was the last she heard from him.
She got up and she crossed the room, dropping her phone into her purse that hung from the coat rack. It wouldn't hurt her feelings if she didn't lay eyes on it again for the rest of the night. She didn't like the way she felt after that short text exchange. She didn't like it at all.
Desperate for a distraction, she helped herself to Isaac's kitchen, searching for, and retrieving, wine glasses and wine. Thankfully, he had a bottle chilling and as she poured herself a glass and took a satisfyingly long sip, she spied Isaac watching her from the doorway. She raised her eyebrows and smiled. "Your 'something comfortable' doesn't vary too much from your previous attire. It took you that long to untuck your shirt and take off your jacket?"
"And take my shoes off."
"Oh. Well excuse me."
"Were you timing me?" He smirked.
"I wasn't until just now."
"Why won't you just admit already that you miss me?"
She raised her chin and took in a breath. "Fine. Maybe I missed you...a little..."
He smirked again, amused, as he walked into the kitchen. "Only a little? Because that message you sent me sounded like you missed me quite a bit..."
"Maybe more than a little..."
He circled around her and rested his palms against the black, marble counter top on either side of her. She turned her head to see him over her shoulder and he kissed her cheek. "This is gonna sound crazy, but there's never been a woman on this side of the bar before."
"Um, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude, I just REALLY needed a glass of wine..."
"No, absolutely help yourself. I have nothing to hide here."
"Well, the wine WAS easy to find..."
"Very funny," he smiled.
She turned around in his arms and got a better look at him and she grinned. "You smell amazing."
She swore she saw him blush a little. "It's the aftershave. It's new, actually, I've never used this kind before."
"That's a lie. You were wearing it at the library the other night."
A grin spread across his face. "You noticed."
"I've also noticed your glasses. Which I'm pleased that you've put back on. I don't know what it is about those glasses but they're incredibly sexy."
"Mmm," he said, searching her face, his eyes lingering on her lips. "Keep talking."
"You like to hear me talk about you? How conceited."
"This is actually the first time you've opened up like this and told me what you like. Forgive me if I'm a little excited about it."
"That's not true, I told you I like your smile."
"And my laugh."
"See? You remember."
"Tell me more."
"How do you know there's more?"
"There's always more."
She scrunched her nose in a grin and glanced downward. "I like how you walk around your house in your bare feet."
He chuckled, amused. "I'm at home. Isn't that normal?"
"It is, I just...I don't know, outside your front door you kinda come across as...I dunno..."
"Pretentious?" He smiled, amused.
"Maybe that's a little harsh..."
"You didn't think it was too harsh not too long ago."
"Things change."
"Do they?"
"If you want them to."
"I want them to."
"So make it happen."
"You make it sound so easy."
"Because it is."
Isaac's lips closed in on Winn's and she wanted to melt. Damn, he was such a good kisser. After a moment, after his tongue completely intoxicated her, Isaac broke the kiss and whispered to her, "Come to bed with me."
Winn's response? The grumbling of her stomach. Loudly.
They both burst into laughter as they both glanced downward. "Or I could make dinner," he said, amused. "Priorities, right?"
He pulled away from her and she pulled him back by his collar. "Hold on, did you say you were making dinner?"
"Yes, I did."
She narrowed her eyes in intrigue and she smiled. "Wow, I didn't know you cooked...I mean, judging by last time..."
He smiled at her, amused, as he searched her face. "I'm single, I'm not helpless."
"I mean, I didn't know, I just..."
"I mean, I'm no gourmet chef or anything," he said, inching his face closer to hers. "But I open the meanest jar of spaghetti sauce on this side of the city."
Winn giggled. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," he smiled, nudging her nose with his.
"Now you're speaking my language," she flirted. "Now get off of me and get to work, I'm starving."
Winn circled the bar and sat down with her wine as she happily watched Isaac work in the kitchen. There wasn't much to what he was doing and he refused to let her help, so they laughed and they talked as she became increasingly turned on by the series of events unfolding in front of her. From the way he rolled up his shirt sleeves, to the way he made her laugh, to the act of his cooking at all, Winn was finding herself on sensory overload and the wine wasn't helping. She wouldn't sleep with him tonight, but she wanted to right now more than ever.
*************
Midway through dinner, and two glasses of wine later, Isaac looked Winn in the eye as he sat next to her at the bar. "You came here for a reason. And I know it wasn't for me to throw together a ten-minute spaghetti."
"I did," she confessed. "I, um, you were right. About a couple of things. And I really had to think some things through. I'm in no way excusing the stunt you pulled on Thanksgiving. Let me just make that clear. However, you're right in the fact that we are not exclusive, you do NOT have any obligations to me, and you didn't technically promise me anything. Those things are true. So maybe, MAYBE in just a couple of very small aspects, I was a little unfair to you."
Isaac furrowed his brow in confusion. "Are you--are you accepting my apology? Because, I mean, I understand if you don't--"
"If you and I were...yanno, a 'thing'...we'd be having a completely different conversation. Actually, I wouldn't be sitting here at all, I probably would have done something creative to you, but--but we're not. So I guess, in some ways, I don't really have much room to make demands at you. You know?"
Isaac wiped his mouth with his napkin and dropped it on the table, sitting back in his bar stool. "What exactly are you trying to say?"
Winn sighed. "I think we should start over. I just--while I'm still a little wary, I enjoy spending time with you. I want to get to know you. But in the meantime, my body can't resist you. It just can't. I, like--I fucking want you ALL the time. Excuse my language, but it's starting to become a little unbearable and a little out of character--"
"Do you want to fuck me, Winn?"
"Um," she swallowed hard. "Um, eventually...I, uh, I wouldn't mind..."
"Because all you gotta do is say the word. I'll do anything to your body you want me to do. No questions asked."
She felt herself blushing. "Um, I think we're getting off subject here--"
"I don't think we are. I think what I'm getting out of this is, you want a casual, sexual relationship. Except you're not ready for the sex part yet. But you want me to wait around and fuck around with you until you are--without getting emotionally attached to me. Because, ultimately, you're afraid of me. So the less you have to feel, the better. As long as your body's getting what it needs, it's not necessary for your heart to get in the
way. How far off the mark am I?"
Winn gaped at him, speechless. Did it really sound that bad? "Um, I mean, when you put it that way--"
"Deal," he said.
She was shocked. "Uh, deal?"
"Yeah. You have yourself a deal. That's all I wanted from the start. That's what I thought we were doing. I like you, Winn. Probably a little more than I should. But I'm not even close to being emotionally available for anything more than what we have now. Someday I'd like to be--but let's not rush it."
"Yeah, but--I mean, it's not--I'm not seeing anyone else. That's the difference here. I'm not sitting here telling you that I'm willing to be one of your floozies--"
"I know. I know, and you're not. That's where--that's where I'm willing to change up my game a little bit. I want--I'm just--I'm really only interested in you right now. And that's the truth. Believe it or don't believe it."
"I'm just--I'm a little scared--"
"What's there to be scared of if you already know what to expect?"
Her eyes darted around the room in thought. He had a point. It was easier said than done, of course, but he still made a very valid point. She needed to loosen up a little bit. Why couldn't she be comfortable with Isaac like she was with Taylor? Oh, no. Please do not think of Taylor right now.
She flashed a smile across her face, desperate to redirect her focus back to Isaac. "Well, then. I, uh, I think we've reached an understanding."
"It's about damn time," Isaac said, turning up his wine glass.
Winn smirked back at him as she turned up her own.
**************
An hour later, Winn found herself where she sort of expected she would end up, but a little more okay with it--underneath Isaac in his guest bed. She took him at his word and he was patient, only going as far as she would let him go. Which, at the moment, was a little farther than maybe she intended, but she wasn't drunk, so she still had plenty of control of herself.
She'd allowed him to remove her skirt, and now he rested between her legs as he unbuttoned her shirt and kissed her lips. She was severely exposed. Oddly enough, she felt more exposed now than she did when she'd stripped for him two weeks prior and that was largely due to the position she'd found herself in at the present moment. In spite of herself, she was so terribly turned on that she knew she had to keep a firm grip on herself before she gave in to something she knew she would grow to regret. She needed to take it slow. She just wasn't ready for sex. She wanted to be, but it nagged at her how she wasn't. She had to respect herself before she cared about what anyone else thought about it.
Isaac opened her shirt and lowered his mouth onto her neck. She decided to give in, just for the moment, and she arched her back at the chills she got from his hot breath caressing her neck. He ran his hands along her skin as his kisses trailed from her neck to her collar bone and further down her chest. His hand, however, had traveled even lower and Winn's nerves found themselves at an all-time high.
His thumb ran along the seam of her cotton panties and he whispered in her ear, "Do you know how easy it would be to just slide in there right now?"
Winn's breathing thickened. Of course she knew. It was all she could think about. "Ike, I--I mean, let's not--just--"
"I know you want me."
"I do. I do want you, I just--just not--" Finally, she had to reach down and redirect his hand upward. "I'm sorry, I'm just not ready."
"You're not even going to let me touch you?"
"I just--if you knew how bad I wanted it, you'd be in trouble," she scoffed. "I just--I know myself. You know? I know me. And--and if I--if you--I don't want to do anything before I'm ready and I don't want to regret it. Believe it or not, control isn't something I do well and I know what my triggers are..."
Isaac sighed and hung his head for a moment as he ran the back of his hand along her stomach. "It's okay. I get it. It's fine."
"Please don't be upset. I promise I'm not trying to lead you on. Maybe we should just--not do things like this anymore--"
His head shot up and his eyes darted into hers. "Are you crazy? Are you--I mean, have you seriously lost your mind?"
"I know I've disappointed you, I'm sorry--"
"Would you just stop talking? I don't--I mean, I like this. I like being here with you like this. Even if we're just talking or whatever, I like it."
Winn's eyes widened and her heart melted. "Seriously?"
"Yeah. Seriously. Winn, I'll be honest, I've never--um--" He smiled and he started to blush, which Winn found incredibly adorable. "I've never gone quite this...slow...with a woman..."
"I suspected as much."
"But I like it. It's--it's different--"
A smile crept across her face. "It's the thrill of the chase."
He locked eyes with her once more. "It's not even that anymore."
Her breath caught and she was instantly ready to get the hell out of the conversation. She couldn't change the subject fast enough. "Ike, look--I actually came here with a specific purpose tonight and I haven't even had the chance to address it yet. And you can turn me down if you want to--"
"I can just about guarantee that there's nothing about you I'm going to turn down--"
She smiled, blushing, and she continued, "My, um, my company is having its annual statewide Christmas party this weekend...in Oklahoma City...and, uh, I was, uh, well I was gonna go alone, but then I thought about it and, um, would you maybe want to go with me? I mean, we'd be there overnight, so if you don't have the time I understand but I wanted to--well I wanted to invite you anyway..."
"You want me to come to your company's Christmas party with you?"
"Uh, I mean, if it's too much--"
"Overnight?"
"They're serving alcohol and they've provided us all with rooms..."
He brought his lips to hers and placed sweet pecks on them with his own. "I would absolutely be honored to go to your party with you."
"Really?" She smiled. "You want to go?"
"The invitation means a lot. I'm already looking forward to it."
As he kissed her again, Winn's heart was a complete mess of puddles. She couldn't help the happiness she was beginning to feel at the prospect of Isaac being at her side at her company function in the next few days. She hadn't realized just how hard she'd actually been crushing on him until that very moment.